The Bloom is in There

I watched an excellent talk the other night given by Brad Wilcox about building self-esteem in children. He said something really interesting and I wrote it down to remind myself. He said that we would never complain that seeds are not flowers. We would never take the packet of seeds back to the store and point to the beautiful image on the seed packet and complain to the manager that these ugly brown things look nothing like the picture on the front.

We wouldn't do that because we recognize the potential that lies within each seed to become a beautiful flower. Instead, we would plant the seed in faith and we would nurture it until it blooms.

When we hold that seed inside our hand, we know the bloom is in there somewhere.

Studies show that one of the leading factors in a lot of self-destructive decisions that teens make is low self-esteem. I have found this to be true as I watch my children and the choices they make: the ones with healthy self-esteem have no problem going against the flow of their peers to make good choices, while the ones that struggle with self-esteem also struggle with peer pressure. Brad Wilcox gave some keys that we can do as parents to help our children increase their self-esteem. And you'll notice he never mentions buying certain clothes or shoes.

P raise (especially in private. Public praise tends to embarrass kids.)

A ccept

R espect

E ncourage

N otice

T ime

S ay (as in, give them a say about some decisions, and let them know that their say matters.)

These are things we can do, I can do. Sometimes we get discouraged with what we see before us in our children, and we think it's nothing like what we were hoping for. But think of that little tiny brown seed. If we gave up on it, not understanding how what we see before us could ever turn into a beautiful bloom, we'd miss the best part.

I'm definitely nurturing the bloom.