I love this blog.
Sometimes I forget how much it means to me, how much of my soul I've bared here. Last night I spent about an hour going back and reading old posts. It filled me with gratitude that I've taken the time to write so much down. Milestones, experiences, snippets from life. I had forgotten so much until my memory was jogged by the blog posts. (It lessened the guilt I feel for not writing as frequently as I wish in my journal. This blog is a journal!) I laughed like crazy. Aiden came home from his friend's house and sat with me on the couch and we read posts and laughed to the point of tears.
Other times, I felt my heart deeply moved with compassion for myself. For me. Because though I am so hard on myself, I can see through my posts that I am really trying. And when I dare to put down in writing some of my feelings, of course there is so much more hidden between the lines. I'm proud of where I've been and what I've come through.
The other thing I was reminded of last night, was how much I love you, the readers of this blog. A handful of you are family (who have to love me), some of you are personal friends, and others of you I've never met. But I read your names and your comments, and I see how long some of you have taken time from your lives to follow mine. It's really humbling. And you can't even begin to understand the strength that your comments have given to me. They mean so very, very much. I had this wish that I could invite you all over for a big slumber party so we could all talk in person. And eat cookies, of course. There would have to be cookies.
Seriously, though, I wish I could know you. But even through this forum, I am so grateful for you, and I consider you friends. We all help each other along this road of life.
There were a lot of posts that I was really proud of. Posts that, when I read them back, feel inspired to me. And sometimes I've written things and months (or years) later I go back and think, "Holy cow, did I really share that?"
This post is #668. That's a lot! I see my children growing up, my education progressing, my marriage evolving, my challenges and trials appearing and becoming resolved. I see the cycles of my garden from seed to harvest, year after year. I see a lot of holidays and traditions, and a whole lot going on in the kitchen.
Reflection. Vulnerability. That's what this blog is for me. And I love it.
I'm curious: What have been your favorite posts from my blog? I would love to know.
And, thank you, friends. There are a lot of blogs out there. Thanks for stopping by to read mine.