Chadwick Immortal

Meet Chadwick, our (Lyndsay's) Holland Lop. He's not supposed to be still alive, but as you can see, he still is. Though, admittedly ragged, poor baby.

This is what he looked like when we bought him. That was ten years ago, three states ago, and three couches ago. He was a reward for Lyndsay, who was six at the time, because she had finally stopped sucking her thumb.

This is Aiden holding baby Chad. Aiden is now getting ready for junior high.

This is Lyndsay holding Chad, after having him for about two years. (See how Aiden is older? See how we're on couch #2?)

Chadwick was supposed to live a maximum of eight years, according to the pet store, and bunny books checked out of the library. So far, he's lived ten, and though he ain't what he used to be, he doesn't seem to be going anywhere anytime soon. We've bought him three different cages, upgrading each time. But cages are expensive, and several years ago, when his cage got cracked, we taped it up. Then when the door broke off, we replaced it with cardboard and more tape. I mean, I wasn't spending that kind of money when he was already past his expiration date, you know? Poor thing lives like a hobo now, though he is definitely fed better than any of the hobos around where I live.

When Lyndsay was 11, and Chadwick had already survived snowy winters outside, scorching summers outside, moving from Arizona to Utah, and Utah to California, both times sharing his cage with a cat, I noticed something different about him, and I contacted a rabbit breeder friend who told me the bunny probably had contracted a deadly and horrifically painful disease called Myxomatosis. The children and I wept. We knew how the disease would progress and that the recommendation was to euthanize the animal to avoid the suffering. Problem was, we were broke. I didn't have the money to even pay for the vet, so we just prayed and prayed, and I worried about what we should do. Lyndsay had Chad sleep in her room, for what would surely be his last nights. It was heartrending, the scene of drama around the house.

But then, Chadwick got better. I mean, he's still here five years later. We don't wish him gone, certainly, but Lyndsay now realizes what a commitment a pet is, and how when she was six, she certainly didn't still want the responsibility through high school. I know every time Lyndsay cleans out the cage she hopes it's the last time, and every time she doles out the money for his food and litter, she wonders how much longer she'll have the expense. It's kind of joke around here now, how he just keeps on living. Dylan says we should return him to the pet store with the complaint that we wanted a "mortal bunny".

Chad got out last night. I came down to make breakfast, and there he was, grazing in the back yard, happy as can be. The tape and cardboard had come loose. Aiden, always a softie for a little creature, brought him inside to hang out. He hopped under the chair in the living room and flopped down to nap. Maestro, the cat, joined him. Neither one seems to realize that they should be enemies.

In fact, several months ago, when the cat got out (who is not supposed to go out. I mean, since he's best buds with a rabbit, he can hardly be trusted to have street smarts. Plus, he is a very expensive brand name kitty.) He was on our property, but some hoodlum gangsta cats found him on the side of our yard and started all up in their jealousy over his pretty, pampered appearance. The bunny, from his spot in the back carport, could hear the ruckus, and seemed to know something was amiss. He started thumping his back legs, which is what Aiden heard from inside the house. Upstairs through an open window I could hear hissing, and I flew down the stairs to rescue the cat, but as I came around the corner, Aiden was just coming into the house with a very humbled kitty in his arms. "I heard the bunny," he said. They take care of each other in their own way.

So, Chadwick hangs on. Who knows how much longer we'll have him. We can't complain really, since he is quite unobtrusive, as far as pets go, and he has endured his share of cage neglect without even a sound. Besides being fed and watered, he gets ignored for long stretches of time, but then he lives for the summer when he is let out to play in the grass and the garden. Fresh carrots and everything.

I love Chadwick, I do. But seriously, if he outlives Lyndsay here at home, something's up. I may just send him with her to college. No?

Running Circles

Last night, Lyndsay and I drove out to the track. She actually drove me, which was not as relaxing as you might think, unless you too have a new teen driver that is behind the wheel of your only means of transportation, in the dark, on the freeway. Lyndsay is being trained by a running coach at her school and has a strict training regimen that includes me going with her to the track most nights of the week. At first, this was slightly irritating to me--one more commitment, and all--but now, it forces me to get my own workout too.

We don't run together. She does her thing, I do mine, and we each keep track of each other, protectively. It's dark when we run, but there are lights on the adjacent school that illuminate the track.

It was cold last night, and windy. Really windy. (I hate windy.) Once we were parked (whew!) and safely out of the car (remember, she drove) we went our separate ways and began our laps. I was so cold, even through my jacket, I'll admit that I thought, "Forget this, I'll wait in the car." But then I thought of the guilt I would feel, and kept on walking. I turned up the music on my iPod and got lost in my thoughts. The sky was dark overhead and the stars were bright.

Every two of my laps, Lyndsay would pass me, and as she ran by, she'd reach out and tap me on the shoulder. The third time that I felt the tap, she passed me on my right, and as she veered back in front of me, I noticed that there was an extremely hunky guy passing on my left, who seemed to be running in time with my daughter. Surely, this was no coincidence. I watched them running ahead of me, perfectly in step with each other, her long hair flying behind her, back and forth in the wind. They were indeed running together.

My daughter picked up some guy at the track! I thought. And I smiled. Big. Because look at her! (And look at him! My goodness!)

They stayed together for the rest of her run, and I picked them out in the darkness several times from my vantage point. I was so happy for her. Not because this was some relationship or something, but because she is at such an exciting time in her life, with the whole world in her grasp, and I just knew her heart was fluttering. She just looked so beautiful to me, so grown up. Almost a full-fledged woman, soon to leave my nest, and look at her go!

When we finished our laps, she walked back to me, alone.

"Who was that hunky guy?" I asked?

"I don't know," she said, barely able to keep her grin to manageable levels. "I was running, and he came up behind me and tapped me on the shoulder and asked if he could run with me. What was I supposed to say?" She hardly seemed put out, though.

"How old was he?"

"In college." Again, with the smug smile. "He asked how long I'd been coming here because he said he surely would have noticed me before."

"Good line," I agreed. "Yeah, he was something."

"He wants to know when I'll be back, so we could run together again."

Oh my.

I have a feeling I'm about to train for a marathon.

Food Storage Tally

Ever so slowly, I've been building our year supply of food storage. This has been tricky because, we have little "extra" money, and we have just about zero storage room in our house. But, I feel strongly about the counsel from our prophets to build up a reserve, so I do the best I can. This means that I have buckets of wheat in the corner of my family room, and against the back wall of my kitchen (behind Conor's play kitchen). I dream of a walk-in food storage pantry someday, but for now, it gives me such peace of mind to see those buckets.

I know that I am working toward a one year supply. Twice a year I buy basic foodstuffs (wheat, beans, dried milk, honey, etc) from a semi-local food co-op for terrific prices, and throughout the year I will stock up on rock-bottom sale prices at grocery stores, or buy some #10 cans of freeze-dried fruits or vegetables when they go on sale at other places I watch. I wondered how I was doing toward my goal. I wanted to know what areas my storage is beefy in, and what areas I might be neglecting, and I wanted a way to track what I add to my food reserve. To help me, I found several free online food storage analyzers.

Here are some you can try and see which format you like best. The contents are all basically the same.

This website (in the top section) has several downloadable forms. This website is Debbie's, and she's the woman who runs our semi-local food co-op. She is amazing, with her dedication and emergency preparedness know-how. I ended up using this one, from Food Storage Made Easy, because it was easier on my eyes.

So, I spent yesterday tallying up what food storage I have on hand and entering it into my new analyzer (which I just saved to my desktop). It doesn't count lots of extra things I have, like canned goods, nonfood items, or all my fruits and vegetables, for example, but it does keep an accounting of basic food storage--life sustaining food storage. I found out I'm about halfway to my wheat goal, and my honey storage is sufficient, but I need more dry milk, oil, and rice, for example. This helps me to focus my future purchases where they're needed most to round out our storage.

I love knowing where I am in relation to where I'm going! It adds to the peace of feeling prepared.

The Week in Review

We begin with Aiden, Student of the Month. We attended an awards assembly in his honor, where he was presented with his certificate and a medal, which he could wear on "Heavy Metal Friday." Good ol' Aiden.

Next we celebrate Dylan, who did an outstanding job on his Chemistry project, organizing a timeline of significant scientists and their discoveries.

On Thursday, I turned in my application at Pasadena City College for the Registered Nursing program. It won't be until late May that I will find out whether or not I am accepted, but man, did it feel good to complete this step!

Our Stake hosted the Los Angeles Area Young Women's Conference. We were so privileged to have Sister Elaine Dalton, the General YW President, come and share the weekend with the girls. On Friday after school, the girls in our stake had a "Run For Virtue" with Sister Dalton around the Rose Bowl. These are the girls in our ward with Sister Dalton.

Here are all the girls in our Stake that ran. What a sight, this bright pink mob! Someone stopped one of our leaders and wanted to know if they were some kind of club or something. The leader said, "We're a church group, and we're running for virtue!" The lady responded, "What's virtue?" Isn't that a sad commentary on the society in which we live? Virtue is sexual purity, fidelity, and chastity, and virtuous women are beautiful!

On Saturday morning we attended the Conference, and there was no way I was going to miss it. I love, love, love the YW program, and even though I'm no longer part of the presidency in our ward, I still sneak my way into most activities because that's where my heart is. Lyndsay was singing in the YW choir that performed, so we had to get there an hour early. This was perfect because I got a seat right up front.

We had a great speaker, Diana Holscher, who travels around speaking to youth. She was great. Then we had a break, and there were hushed voices saying that there was a surprise coming up that nobody knew about. We knew there would be something, but didn't know what. As we got back into our seats to begin the second half of the conference, a young man walked in just to my left and sat down across the aisle from me. My friend whispered, "Is that David Archuleta?" Holy cow, it was! Our Stake YW President, who had orchestrated this event, got up to introduce him, and when she said his name, you should have heard the 800 girls start screaming---in the chapel! It was crazy! I was so happy to be seated right in front. I realize he's only 20 years old, but he is such a cutie! And what a voice! He sang "I am a Child of God," "I'm Trying to be Like Jesus," and "Be Still My Soul." Incredible. He spoke for about an hour too. Such a treat!

And then Sister Dalton spoke, giving a powerful message to the girls to remember who they are and to not settle for less than they deserve, living virtuous lives, attracting the boys who will respect them and be honorable priesthood holders, and using these years to prepare themselves for what God has in store for them. She is such a beautiful, elegant woman, and she has a love that radiates out from her. All of the girls wanted more.

As a treat for our girls in our Stake, our leaders organized an opportunity for each ward to spend half of an hour with Sister Dalton in the Stake YW President's home, where she was staying. No leaders were allowed in with the girls. They just sat in the living room with her and got to talk with her. She asked them questions about what it's like to be a young woman right now and what's hard, what's easy. I am incredibly grateful that my Lyndsay (and also Caitlin, later on with her ward) to have had this opportunity, one so rare, and one that will stay with them forever. I know it had an impact on Lyns, and I'm grateful for every experience that strengthens her and increases her vision of who she is and what she can become.

It's been a good week!

Books I Read in January

Dracula took me a bit to read. Not because it was difficult (I actually thought it was surprisingly easy), but because I started it at the end of the year when I was working hard to keep my A in Microbiology, and then I had my marathon Christmas sewing spree. I was able to finish it right at the first of January, and I really enjoyed it. There are so many classics I want to read. I own shelves of them, but I often get stuck passing them over for more current reads. I am trying to discipline myself to slowly work my way through, and Dracula has long been on my list. I loved that it was spooky right from the get-go, and that the intrigue and suspense stayed high throughout the story.

I loved, loved, loved this book. So much so that I have a goal to read everything that Alison Weir has ever written. The time period alone had me sold, but Weir is very adept at storytelling, and her research is so impeccably done. Innocent Traitor tells the story of Lady Jane Grey, who was England's shortest reigning queen, reigning for only 9 days, and totally against her wishes. I really enjoyed getting to know Jane in this story, as well as the backdrop characters like young Queen Mary, Queen Elizabeth, and the infamous Henry VIII. Even the most gruesome details of this period of England's history were told with such emotion.

Amazon.com voted Unbroken November 2010's Best Book of the Month, and in their Top 10 Books of the Year. It has to be. You read this book and can't even believe that this is the story of one man! Like a real life Forrest Gump, but in hell. Laura Hillenbrand tells the story of Louie Zamperini, a scrappy little Italian kid who is always getting into the weirdest (and funniest) trouble as a kid, and to keep him focused and on the straight and narrow, his older brother has him start running track. Soon it is realized that Louie is not just any runner, and within a few short years finds himself running in the Olympics, shaking Adolf Hitler's hand, and set to break the world record for fastest mile. But then he is drafted into the War and flying as a bombardier. Whose plane goes down. Only three survive and they float in the Pacific Ocean for 47 days (setting a record for longest survival on a raft), fighting off starvation, dehydration, and hundreds of hungry sharks. They finally reach land, only to realize that it is Japanese occupied, and he spends the next year plus as a prisoner of war at a camp the rest of the world doesn't even know exists, and at the hands of some of the most violent and sadistic Japanese Corporals. This is an incredible story of an even more incredible life and man. And just like Hillenbrand's Seabiscuit, I hope this one also becomes a film.

These next books are ones that were sent to me by Luisa. They were a perfectly inspired prescription. M. Catherine Thomas has become one of my new favorite writers. There is so much truth, simplicity, and profound depth in her writing. This book taught me to trust the plan for me, for my marriage, and for my children. That all things are in God's hands much more intricately than I can ever comprehend in my mortality is a soothing relief. I will reread this book, for sure.

Sometimes it's easier to not think about, but in truth, this is a spiritual world that we live in. There are spirits, both light and dark, and their influence is very real. This books describes those spirits and also light and dark in other forms in our lives and how to be more aware of the forces working in our lives. Much food for thought, and also valuable tools to use.

This is the book I referred to yesterday when I wrote about our Family Home Evening lesson. This is one meaty book. I love that Thomas seeks truth from all sources, not just LDS ones. Inspiration is available to all, but can be magnified by the choices we make in our lives. There is a current of energy that flows through life that enlightens and inspires, and its source is God. The nearer we get to Him, and the more like Him we become, the more full of love we are and the more access we have to that which He wants us to have and know. This is a very compassionate book, tender with those of us who are trying our faltering best. It is also a book filled with the most beautiful hope that I've ever read, besides the scriptures, of course. It has given me so, so much to think and ponder on. Completely life-changing.

A moving read by one of my favorite authors. I adore Richard Paul Evans' stories, and I did long before I knew him personally. His stories make me happy and thoughtful. They're easy to read and hard to forget. This has to be one of my favorites. Promise Me is about Beth and the men she has loved. One in particular, whose love came quite unexpectedly at a devastating time, and which changed the entire course of her life in an unbelievable way. When I just want a quick, fun story, I can always count on Richard Paul Evans.

What's Inside

One of the books I just read, Light in the Wilderness, by M. Catherine Thomas, has given me an abundance of insight to ponder over the last week. I kept my red pencil poised and ready each time I was able to steal a few minutes to sit and read. There were so many wow moments, moments of enlightenment, and often I would have this desire to share what I'd just read. One such insight became our Family Home Evening lesson last night.

I handed Aiden an orange and an empty glass, and I asked him to squeeze me some grape juice. He just looked at me. Dylan piped up, "Um, isn't that an orange?" Yes, yes, so no grape juice? Fine then. I handed Lyndsay an apple and asked her for some orange juice. Of course, she referred me to Aiden.

The message was, we can only give to others what's inside of us. The way we respond to others reflects what we have developed within ourselves. An orange can only give orange juice, an apple, apple juice.

Thomas quotes Wayne Dyer, "Regardless of how another person interacts with you, you can give away only what you have inside to give. Just like the proverbial orange, when you squeeze it, you get what is inside--it has nothing to do with who does the squeezing, or the circumstances surrounding the squeeze. What comes out is what is inside. . . . If you respond to hate with hate, or anger with anger, it is not because of what was directed your way; it is because that is what is inside of you. You can't give hate if you have only love inside, no matter how much squeezing comes your way."

I love the power this truth gives me. If, then, I wish to know the state of my being, I can evaluate what it is I am giving out to others. This gives us an incredible amount of insight into ourselves, and control over our lives, something that appeals to everyone. The truth is, we can never control what another person will say or do, or how they will treat us. We can't always determine our circumstances, either. We can certainly influence those things, but the only person we have control over, is ourselves.

I wanted my children to think about this because so often we get into the game of, "Well, he did such-and-such," or, "She makes me so mad!" or, "If he wasn't such a jerk. . ." It is a common condition to blame our reactions and feelings on people and circumstances, but if one can only give out what one has inside, then it really doesn't matter if someone else has hate or anger. What matters is what you have inside. And you can know, by what comes out of you! An instant state-of-being barometer!

People will say, "Well, I can't help how I feel." That, I told my children, is a lie. How you feel is actually one of the things you can help! Others will blame, "Well he made me so mad!" Another lie. Pure deception, and the important reason to know that is because those lies take away our power! They leave us as a flailing victim, tossed and battered by circumstance, and that is not what any of us are.

Dylan made the comment that we can react differently with different people and in various ways at different times throughout a single day. True! So we better be on guard! What glorious feedback we have the opportunity to glean about ourselves each day and in each relationship!

We talked about what we do if we realize we're giving out hate, anger, meanness, or accusation. We decided that Christ is the source of all love, and we can't be close to Christ and filled with anything unkind. What a reliable spirit check, then! If we are struggling with hate or anger, we must be too far from Christ, and we know what we can do to draw closer to Him. We'll know when we make it back to His side when love starts to pour out of us, especially when something less favorable is coming our way.

I have been paying close attention. I have seen the miracle of love coming out of me, from a calm and contented heart, even in the face of hostility and anger. I have wondered at it, and now I understand and am so grateful. I have also felt the blackness of returning anger with anger, hate with hate. I prefer the love. And because I now have to accept accountability for that love, I have a new outlook on my dealings with all of my relationships and circumstances.

I hope my children do too. They deserve to feel powerful, in an authentic way.

Spring Garden Plans

My friends on the east coast are getting their fair share of snow this winter. I have to admit a little jealousy at their being snowed in, having school cancelled, and bundling up in front of movies all day while the world outside is covered in white. I do miss real winter. But there are good things about living in southern California, too, I know. Like the fact that I just enjoyed a long walk without even long sleeves, and the fact that I can plant a garden. Right now.

I got a package of new seeds in the mail this week. That's always fun. I took out all my seeds today and made a list of what I want to plant this spring (now) and what I will plant for my summer garden. My summer garden list is longer, and many of those plants take up much more space. Summer brings favorites like zucchini and cantaloupe, and tomatoes, in all their varieties. But winter/spring can still yield abundance, like peas, broccoli, spinach, carrots, and so many kinds of lettuce. I'm trying a few new things too: a new variety of garden peas, a new variety of spinach, some cabbage, and also leeks. We'll see how they do.

Last year, I made a master plan of my garden beds and saved it on my computer so that I can print it off and fill in my plantings. I put down the date that I planted, and how many plants in each square, based on the Square Foot Gardening method. When one harvest is complete, I'll often go back and put something new in the space, like where I stuck watermelon and pumpkins after spinach was done for the summer. This keeps me organized and gives me information about what varieties are where, how long germination is taking, when to expect harvests, and which companion plantings worked well (and which didn't).

The nice thing about winter/spring crops is that most of them prefer to be planted directly in their garden spaces, so I can skip the step of planting indoors and transplanting later. Now, I will look at my list, and make my plan! I'll keep you posted!