August 13, 2015: BYU Commencement

Road trip! The culmination of our summer was driving up to Utah to celebrate the culmination of Lyndsay's college experience at Brigham Young University. I got to drive with the three boys, which was awesome since two of them could help drive!

We drove up the day before. I actually really like road trips with the kids, being "stuck" together for a nice long time. We had some conversation, some laughs (Dylan is hilarious), and the boys got some reading done in between video game sessions.  Conor is working his way through the Far World series,

And Aiden was hard at work on his AP English Language assignment, reading and annotating The Fiddler in the Subway. Great book.

When we first arrived in Provo, it was late and we were starving. We drove right to Cafe Rio and ate dinner, and then headed back to the hotel to crash. Well, some of us wanted to crash. The boys were so hyped up and insisted on jumping on beds and throwing pillows around and laughing and, well, being boys. Which they apparently are slow to grow out of. But finally we were able to settle down after enough mishaps and Mom going slightly crazy.

The next day, we needed to work together to get Lyndsay moved out of her apartment before the ceremony. Her brothers worked hard packing and lifting for her. She had already done a lot of the work and cleaning, but man, moving is a huge job.

And, we realized, she has too much stuff.

She stored most of her things in the garage of one of her professors (whom she babysits for as well), and then some of it went in her car, and some in mine. Some we took to Deseret Industries to donate. Cleaning out her fridge and freezer meant that she made huge batches of smoothies and kept making us drink one after the other.

Then we all came back to the hotel room to get ready for the graduation.

The commencement was held at the Marriott Center on BYU's campus. We got there very early to be sure we could get good seats. My dad had flown in from North Dakota for this event, and Lyndsay's dad and his family had driven up from Arizona. Adam met us there from St. George, where he's been working. The one thing we all had in common was our love and pride in this girl we get to call ours.

Lyndsay's major was Bioinformatics, which is a conglomerate of computer science, genetics, and molecular biology. She minored in Computer Science. She's a real life scientist!

We are extra proud of her because my mom and I realized that Lyndsay is the first female anywhere in the family, both sides to receive her Bachelor's degree! She's a pioneer and she is paving the way for all of her female cousins and her future daughters and granddaughters.

After we were settled in our seats, Lyndsay had to leave us to go line up with the graduates. We waited anxiously. (And I enjoyed seeing Dylan all dressed up in a shirt and tie.)

Lyndsay texted me this picture of her and her best friend and roommate, Emily from the processional line outside. It made me tear up instantly. This is real! There is my girl in a cap and gown!

When the graduates started entering the stadium, they walked down several different aisles. I was scanning the blue caps, searching for my girl, when all of a sudden, I heard, "Mom!" There she was, walking right by us! We had picked a most fortunate spot to sit, and it melted my heart that she wanted to be sure that I saw her. I love the expression of pure joy on my dad's face. He graduated from BYU's undergraduate and law program so many years ago.

The faculty came and sat on the stand, along with the commencement speakers, Elder Russell M. Nelson and Elder Dallin H. Oakes, there in the front in the green and red robes.

The speakers were excellent and appropriately inspiring. The degrees were pronounced upon the graduates, and then they left the arena, officially finished with their programs. We got to see Lyndsay again as she filed past our row. Man, she glows.

We met up with her outside for hugs, tears of joy, and pictures.

All of us together, who came to celebrate our Lyndsay.

That day also happened to be Conor's 9th birthday. We had talked with him about postponing his celebration til we got home, but we still wanted to be sure he got a little birthday love. Here we are driving over to the restaurant. Love this boy.

We ate at Buffalo Wild Wings, though through a series of unfortunate circumstances, Adam never made it to dinner.

We surprised Conor with some birthday love.

I love this man so much. He is a hero to me, and it meant so much that he could be there to share in this joyous occasion.

My birthday buffalo.

We headed back to the hotel for some swimming and fun and then went to bed even more excited for the events of the next day.

The Other Parts of our Trip

Adam and I are officially "back together." I need to write a post about that. It happened unexpectedly and only very recently, though even before that time I had invited him to come with us up to Arizona for Dylan's graduation. Aiden was not able to come because just days before we were leaving, our beloved kitty, Maestro got very, very sick. We took him to the doctor, but he needed care at home, so Aiden volunteered to stay and tend to him. We were sad Aiden couldn't be with us, but so relieved that the kitty was in good hands.

I really wanted this to be a good experience for Adam and me. It's hard for him, and vulnerable for me, because Arizona was a part of my life that happened before he did. I was married to another man, I was building a first family, I was mourning the loss of a different marriage. These are sensitive subjects for him, so I felt cautious in what I reminisced about aloud, but I also really wanted him to open up to all of the parts of my life, as my past brought me to him. It was a bit of a dance, but I was grateful that he came along.

The long stretch of highway between California and Arizona is well known to me. For many years, I drove five hours to the halfway point, at this Exit 69 on I-10 where I would meet my ex-husband and "make the exchange," either dropping off or picking up our three big kids, and then turn around and drive the five hours back home. I did it alone, I did it pregnant, I did it with an infant, then a baby, then a toddler, then a little kid Conor. Many, many times. And then we started to put them on airplanes and have them fly. (That's been so much easier!)

Seeing the exit brought back so many memories. I used to get this huge knot in my stomach and then fight to hold back tears as we approached, only to let them free once I was driving in the opposite direction. Those were hard times.

On our way through the Phoenix valley, we had an impromptu visit with my sister Amanda and her family, to say goodbye before they move back to New Jersey. It was so good to see her and get to hug her.

Then we headed over to the Gilbert Temple. Adam has the picture, but when we were walking around, we ran into an old friend of mine from years and years ago when I lived in Show Low. It was so random that her family was the only other family there, and they had just come out of the temple with her son who had received his endowments preparatory to leaving on his mission. It must have been twelve years since I'd last seen her. What a cool reunion!

Then we made a quick dash over to my brother Josiah's house so I could squish my newest niece, Everleigh. She is just the cutest thing! Oh, my goodness, it made me want a baby so badly!

(Conor would love that. He wants a baby too, but I'm afraid that's not to be.)

My handsome brother.

And his darling wife. I love her and wish we lived closer.

Finally, late that night we ended up in Show Low, driving through the canyon and the forests in the dark. Oh, the memories! I have driven those roads countless times, and there was such an interesting feeling as we approached town. Those mountains hold so much for me. My life unraveled there, and I came to know the Savior in the most personal way there as a result.

We stayed with my dad and Raelene, and they treated us to a huge breakfast our first morning.

Conor was thrilled for some chicken action. Grandpa and Grandma have lots of chickens! Conor learned to feed worms to the chickens and we checked on the eggs that their hen, Chik Patty was setting on.

He played some chess with Grandpa.

And some Pick-Up-Sticks.

Then we headed over to the Staley house for a pre-graduation party. I was so happy to see my boy! I hadn't seen him since his visit at Christmas.

The next morning we headed to the Snowflake Temple, another hallowed spot for me.

And then we went back up to Pinetop to the Ace Hardware where Dylan has worked for the last eighteen months. It was fun to see him in action. Here he is cutting rebar.

He was so great as he helped customers, and he showed us the aisles of the store that are his sole responsibility. He's doing a great job there!

I also loved that he took me around and introduced me to his friends and co-workers. I love hearing my kids say, "This is my mom." It's my favorite title in the world.

Conor played at the Staley house for a while for their youngest boy's birthday, and then we made a quick trip over to the Family Fun Park while we waited for Dylan to get off work.

Dylan got to choose wherever he wanted to go for dinner and he chose Aliberto's, a kind of fresh fast-food Mexican joint, that I have to say was pretty delicious.

Then we enjoyed our last night with Grandpa, who showed Conor his cool fossil collection, as he has all the other grandchildren before him. My children love their Grandpa. He is so gentle and kind to them and shows such a loving, personal interest in them.

And then, early Sunday morning, Grandma took Conor out to the Chicken Cacciatorium, and lo, and behold. . .

There was a fresh hatchling! What a sweet privilege for little Conor!

Then it was back on the road. We stopped at the bottom of the Salt River Canyon, but the sun was pretty bright!

And it was hot!

And after our stop at the Mesa Temple, we settled in for the long stretch home.

It was a good trip in some very important ways.